“For Real Life?”

What can ABC Kids’ most popular stars the Heeler Family teach us about playful parenting?

Bingo, a four-year-old red heeler, has just found out she’s not invited to the birthday party her big sister, Bluey, is getting ready for. She sadly laments, “Why is it always me that misses out?”

Suddenly, a cockatoo feather magically falls from the sky and lands on the deck in front of her. Bingo’s eyes widen with wonder and delight, “ooooo”. She quickly scampers over and picks it up, then tries out its potential on a roll of tape:

“Sticky tape- heavy!” and struggles to pick up the now magically heavy tape. She giggles with delight and declares, “Featherwand!”

In this short sequence, we get a glimpse into what it is like to be four. No power over your circumstances, struggling to understand fairness and social situations. Very quickly, play is brought into the picture: now, Bingo has won back some control over her circumstances in a most magical way. Dad’s making cereal. Spoon- “heavy!”. Mum’s writing down the party address. Pen- “Heavy!”. Keys- “Heavy!”. Dad’s left butt cheek- “Heavy!”. And finally, present- “Heavy!”. Mum gives up and declares Bingo wins. At this point, Bingo is delighted, ‘unheavy’s’ everything and lets them go to the party. Through her play and fun, Bingo has gained back some control, realised she can self-initiate her own fun and perhaps, even gained a little empathy in the process. 

But a key factor in navigating this tricky time of self-exploration and learning is Mum and Dad Heeler’s approach to the situation. 

Firstly, Mum honestly talks with Bingo about not being invited to the party and reflects Bingo’s feelings in the tone of her voice, showing Bingo that she hears her in her sadness of being left out. Secondly, when play ramps up and Bingo begins to try to stop the rest of the family from getting ready for the party, Mum and Dad play along, with an attitude of permissiveness and fun, allowing mess, creativity, spontaneity, and child-led play. Thirdly, Mum and Dad let the play and its consequences play out, giving Bingo the chance to see how her actions influence others and how they might make others feel. In seven minutes, Chilli and Bandit have demonstrated how, through playful parenting, we can help our kids to weather the storms of understanding the world and their place in it. 

Creator of Bluey, Joe Brumm wants to inspire parents to see how play can help in kids’ development of their sense of self and others. A father himself, Brumm has seen firsthand just how vital play is to a child’s growth and development. Brumm says:

“Bluey is based on the experience of raising two daughters. Playing seems as natural to them as breathing. It's fascinating seeing how much they learn from devising and playing their own games, especially the more elaborate and social ones. So Bluey is a celebration of the role imaginative play has in shaping healthy kids.” (Sourced from: https://tv.press.abc.net.au/abc-kids-and-bbc-worldwide-partner-with-award-winning-ludo-studio-on-new-preschool-animated-series)

And:

“It’s to encourage people to look at play not just as kids mucking around, but as a really critical stage in their development that, I think, we overlook at their peril.” (Sourced from: https://www.the-father-hood.com/article/bluey-how-a-cartoon-dog-became-your-ultimate-guide-to-fatherhood/)

This echoes the sentiments of Dr. Stuart Brown, researcher into play and founder and president of the National Institute for Play in America, who said “Play is more than fun” (Brown, 2010). When studying the motivations of convicted murderers, he found an absence of a nurturing and playful childhoods (American Journal of Play, 2009). While this is an extreme example, it highlights that play is more than fun, it is vital. Children who do not have opportunity to play lack social understanding, flexibility, emotional regulation, ability to form relationships, an understanding of right and wrong, coping strategies and more (Brown & Vaughan, 2010; see https://childandfamilyblog.com/play-deprivation-early-child-development/). Play is where children learn social limits, understand how it feels to be someone else or how their actions make someone else feel (Shaefer & Drewes, 2014). Through rough and tumble play, children learn to understand the cues of others and their own feelings about what is playful and permissible, and what is not okay and needs to stop (Brown, 2010). Imagination is where children can pretend the world is different, try things on for size and project their own thoughts and emotions onto toys to work through them at a safe distance (Cochran, Nordling & Cochran, 2010; Stagnitti, 2009). Play much more than just fun.

Approaching parenting with an attitude of fun, flexibility, spontaneity, empathy, permissiveness and following your child’s lead supports a child’s growth through play and allows the Therapeutic Powers of Play to work their magic on your child’s sense of who they are in relation to the world (for more information, see ‘Why Play?’). 

So perhaps the next time opportunity arises with the little players in your life, seize the moment, embrace the spontaneity, reach for that now ‘heavy’ object and ask yourself,

             “What would Bandit and Chilli do?”

References

American Journal of Play (2009). Discovering the Importance of Play through Personal Histories and Brain Images: An Interview with Stuart L. Brown. American Journal of Play, 1(4), 399-412. 

Brown, S. & Vaughan, C. (2010). Play, how it shapes the brain, opens the imagination and invigorates the soul. Penguin Random House.

Brown, S. L. (2010). Play is More Than Just Fun [Video File]. Retrieved from https://www.ted.com/talks/stuart_brown_play_is_more_than_just_fun?language=en

Brumm, J. (Writer) & Jeffery, R. (Director) (2020). Featherwand (Season 2, Episode 3) [Television serives episode]. In C. Aspinwall (Executive producer), Bluey. ABC; BBC.

Cochran, N. H., Nordling, W. J. & Cochraine, J. L. (2010). Child-Centered Play Therapy: A Practical Guide to Developing Therapeutic Relationships with Children. New Jersey: John Wiley & Sons, Inc.

LUDO Studios (n.d.). Heeler Family [Digital Image]. Disney+. https://prod-ripcut-delivery.disney-plus.net/v1/variant/disney/C97702644536A95DFFD8F5BE991362279ACE778BD2C05A5C9CD7A2E254771F69/scale?width=1920&aspectRatio=1.78&format=jpeg

Schaefer, C. E. (2011). Foundations of play therapy (Second edition.). Wiley.

Schaefer, C. E., & Drewes, A. A. (2014). The therapeutic powers of play: 20 core agents of change (Second edition. ed.): John Wiley & Sons, Inc.

Stagnitti K. (2009) Play Intervention – The Learn to Play Program. In K. Stagnitti and R. Cooper (Eds.), Play as Therapy: Assessment and Therapeutic Interventions (pp. 176-186). London: Jessica Kingsley Publishers.